Are you feeling that forward motion energy out there? The New Year brings such new hope and bright ideas to the surface. There's something about flipping that virtual calendar to a new year that feels like a clean slate.
And yet, we never really are clean slates, no matter what the calendar says.
Our patterns, memories, identities, and ego structures follow us from calendar year to calendar year. This is only a problem, however, if it's a problem. Some of our patterns are really good! You might have a pattern of stopping and thinking before you respond to someone. Your pattern might be early bedtimes and rising at dawn to meditate and journal. You might see yourself for what you truly are (which is perfect, whole, and complete). You might show up right away when a friend is in distress or there's a pet that needs adopting. Heck, hopefully you at least have the pattern of brushing your teeth every day.
I’ve been thinking a lot about things that haunt--not just tech goblins or spooky ghosts, but haunts from the past. Old experiences, relationships, and patterns that appear from time to time to hijack our present happiness.
Last week I met a dear friend for a walk in our local park. It was a beautiful day in a beautiful week for me. I’m a big fan of October--the flowers are jewel-toned, the weather cools down, it’s my birthday... ;)
But for my friend, it’s full of anxiety. She shared with me that deep in her bones there is a fear. This fear comes from a traumatic memory of last Halloween--an event that had her on the edge for months afterward. Although she and her family are now on the other side of it, the anticipation of the one-year anniversary was causing great suffering. She wanted to skip the whole holiday. They all wanted to avoid it. I totally got that.
But after chatting a bit, we...